Things You Wish You Knew @ 17 #3

Your Voice is Beautiful because it belongs to you.

My voice is beautiful because it belongs to me. The third thing I’d like to share with you that I wish I had learned @ 17 is that I am beautiful because I am unique, and a one of a kind. You are beautiful because you are unique and one-of-a-kind. The entire structure of the US social idea promotes comparing ourselves to everyone else. This a deeply damaging message to tell yourself, your children, or anyone for that matter. When you are comparing yourself to someone else you are in fact comparing apples to oranges, or pickles to tomatoes, or a bicycle to an airplane (you get the pic?). Naturally, we all share some commonalities, such as breathing, brains (?), etc….but overall our absolute beauty lies in our individuality.

As I refer to my voice being beautiful, I am referring to the actual sound of my voice – which I have always struggled with the sound of it. It has only been very recently that I’ve come to accept the actual sound of my voice as being pitch-perfect, and that came from considerable work on my self worth, self esteem and accepting that I am a unique product of the universe. Behind my voice is a beautiful, innocent little girl that was conditioned by her environment – hearing many, many times that I was stupid or:

  • “What were you thinking?”
  • “You can’t do that.”
  • “You want to do what with your life?”
  • “Can’t you do anything right?”
  • “You’re an idiot!”
  • “No, no, no, no.”

Sometimes, even said in jest, these words leave affect people seeming invisibly; scarring them on the inside and inhibiting their growth, cowering their self esteem, self worth, and self confidence to flourish with their god given natural beauty.

Recently, at a training I was conducting, I asked a young, attractive gal to read out load off of the PowerPoint presentation. She replied, “I don’t want to read, I hate my voice.’ I could completely relate to her. She actually had a pretty nice voice; to her, however, it sounded ugly. Her thinking is directly related to her own self worth and lack of acceptance of the beauty of human nature coupled with individual uniqueness. I told her I could relate and that I once too felt that about my voice – sure I’m no Carrie Underwood or Celine Dion when it comes to harmony and perfect angelic like tones. I am, however, equally as important and beautiful on the inside and the out as anyone else. I carry my own special gifts and talents in this world and SO DO YOU. If you don’t believe this concept that is likely because you haven’t uncovered or discovered who you are, or what your voice is. Finding your voice is about finding your identity and being OK with that identity. People will always judge – and that says more about them than it does about you. As Taylor Swift says, “Haters gonna hate.” That’s not healthy and does not produce a happy life. If you haven’t yet found your voice, know that everyone brings the ability to love one another to this world and that, by itself, is beautiful and so are you!

Just For Today – tell yourself you are beautiful.

The Combination Notebook:

Energy – It requires a ton of energy to dislike yourself and your voice; you own the choice to turn that negative energy to positive.

Choice Wheel by Ginger RossChoices – You get to choose what you want to believe and every choice has a consequence; some good – some not.

Energy – Be aware of your energy levels when you’re angry versus when you are happy. Feel the difference.

Beliefs – are usually learned behavior from your upbringing.

Perception – Perceptions are built from environments. You get to choose what you want to think ad believe.

Expectations – are built from perceptions, and again – environment. These are learned behaviors. You can change them.

Choices – Unhealthy or healthy – conform to society (generally unhealthy) or maintain high ethics, morals and values (healthy).

How do you choose to use this day you’ve been given?

Healthy choices, friends.



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